The most precious piece of jewelry I own is not my Tiffany pearl earrings, my great-grandmother’s diamond ring, or even my wedding ring. It’s a bracelet that cost about $45, and it’s made by a company whose principles I don’t even support. So why is it worth so much to me? Because it’s the non-human, non-spirit thing that best exemplifies who I am and why I do what I do. It’s the thing that reflects me best. It’s a freedom badge for me. It’s my way of saying “This is who I am and I’m unapologetic about it.”
In this world, it’s hard for me to think that anyone ever really “gets” me. About two months ago, Beth Moore had a series on Wednesdays with Beth that walked through how important it was to understand that it’s okay to want to be known. You know, that deep, penetrating kind of known. She also brought to light that God does know us, and yet, He still wants us to express our desire to be known by Him. It was powerful to me. I mean, earth shattering, tear jerking powerful.
Well, I knew my whole life that God did know EVERYTHING, I just didn’t realize that He knew everything out of a place of love. Because He loves me so much, that He desired to pay attention to every detail that He either created or allowed. It’s out of that love that He allows others to know me. It’s not my choice. To be honest, I couldn’t share anyway because when I try to share everything (ok, ok, a whole lot) with others, most of the time, fear blocks my path. I can’t even let go if I wanted to. It would be horrible to live this way, except God loves me enough to give me a path to share in a safe space. For me, it’s when I get to pray with people. I could never figure out why that place was always safe for me, but today, I found a quote that pretty much summed it up:
“Dear God. I am only FULLY myself (when I’m) in you. May all people see Your reflection in me.”
Now that quote would usually turn me off. Religious mumbo jumbo. Blah.
But for me, that’s a truth that I can’t argue with. When someone allows me free reign to pray whatever I want for them, I slip into a place where I let God take over and He immerses me in Himself. It’s incredible. I get to be what He created me to be, without the sin or lack of self confidence; the burdens or the worry. I get to be just a vessel that carries people to the one I love most. I’m fulfilled. I’m also in a place of perfect trust. When I step out that big, I have to fully believe that God knows me, He knows the person I’m praying for, and He won’t let either of us down.
It’s a place of encouragement. It’s a place where I feel the words of Micah 5:2
But you, O Bethlehem of Ephrathah, who are one of the little clans of Judah, from you shall come forth for me one who is to rule in Israel, whose origin is from of old, from ancient days.
I feel little. I feel like if those who were asking me for prayer really knew me they wouldn’t ask. But God. But God allows me to have purpose by declaring that He will use me to reflect Himself. Whoa. Whoa. Yeah. I went there. It’s not me breaking into your life. It’s God, and He’s merely allowing me to witness it.
Prayer with others is a place where I allow myself to be known, and where I accept His invitation to allow others into the deepest relationship I have.And by doing so, He gives others insight into who I really am. It’s beautiful, really.