I’ve never “done” boundaries well. I am actually someone who is offended when people have strict boundaries. Growing up in an enmeshed Italian houshold, there was no modeling of boundaries. The joke about my family was that someone could live in our house six months, and we wouldn’t know. The door was always open to people, with their joys and sorrows, and to anyone who had a need.
Those of you who know me know that this is something I have carried into my life with one exception: my spiritual walk. I learned over the past five years that there should be boundaries, firm ones at that, to Satan’s prescence in your life. A Beth Moore video organized these boundaries well for me. I’m going to share them with you:
Intimacy with God: When I am overwhelmed, I am NOT a nice woman. I quickly become a woman of destruction. I lose control; I lose sound mind. I have learned that I need my time with God everyday. Not for His sake, but for mine. He is my source of peace. He is my stability — He steadies me. This time is not the time I spend in intercession for others. This is not my praise and worship time. This is my time to just be honest. He blesses my honesty — however unpolished — every time.
Past Hurts: I have learned that if I am hurt, and I don’t ask God to heal it, Satan will poke me in the ribs every time. It’s an immediate weakness. I have committed to processing through hurts, no matter how much I cry or yell, with God and then with others. If this shield isn’t up, I don’t tend to hurt others. I just lose confidence in myself.
Life Experiences: I need weekly, if not daily, experiences of going deep with others. I want to be someone others trust because I share openly with them. The emotional and story sharing is critical to keeping Satan at bay.
Spiritual Gifts: I know what my giftings are. It’s essential to know what you are gifted in. I walk in my giftings. I don’t let Satan or anyone else accuse me that I’m not good enough or am not gifted in what God has told me and confirmed to me that I am gifted in. You can’t JUST be gifted. You need to step out in your giftings. If you don’t know how, talk to someone who does use their giftings. If you are overwhelmed when you step out, may I humbly suggest that you MAY be persisting in something that you are not gifted in. The only other option is that Satan is bringing discouragement, which you need to go pray with someone else about and take your land back. When we are functioning in our gifts, the fruit is joy, confidence, intimacy with God, and transformation in your life and the life of others. If you don’t see that, you’re in the wrong area of service. If you don’t know what your giftings are, take this test:
This is a link to the PDF that you can print off:
When people say that I’m strong, when people say that I am deeply spiritual, it’s because these are my walls. These are my priorities for serving the Kingdom. This is my armor against Satan. This is how I can handle fifty bazillion things. I don’t take on one more task that would affect these boundary lines.
When I feel threatened on these areas, and I feel like I can’t keep up these walls, I remember the words of Psalm 3:3
But You, O LORD, are a shield about me, My glory, and the One who lifts my head.
God is the one who protects me first. HE is the one who says I can do this. That I’m worthy and strong. I’m not going to argue with the Lord of the Universe. I’m not going to believe Satan when I can believe God. This is the way we share life with God and receive His glory to be salt and light.